Posts Tagged ‘Equality’

In a moment my head turns smoothly as if dragged by the swivelling of my eyes, towards a window, towards a patch of sky, and I realize that I am looking for a reference to this belief in the existence of a door into another world. There are still the remnants of that illusion in my system. There is no way out of here, no way out of the totality of this projection which is me. Checking for a ‘ray’ of hope in the world is an activity of ego worship, in which I am promoting the continuation of the reign of consciousness. I have slipped into the same illusion that attempts to make real the arrival of God into physical reality such as ‘doomsday’ and ‘2012’ so that proof that God exists has been established here, and I am ‘right’…All in the absence of a single breath.

And here I see a point; I ask from what is it that I turn away? Is there really an ‘away’ to turn towards that is not another image in my mind? A fear has slipped up inside me and I have accepted it, allowed myself to exist as it, and to exist as less than it and I have turned away, and I realize that I have also accepted anger at myself, and I realize that this is how I treat myself when I am angry at me for being who I am; I ignore myself, I look away from the things which I have made, I avoid the face to face, I go all quiet, I keep the judgements which I have made racked up on a high shelf where I do not have to see them. I change the subject, I go off into distraction , into the sky and the clouds, and there I make-believe a ‘ray’ of hope.


It’s quite funny, I have to laugh at myself; I had a what the fuck sort of moment, in which I was going, ‘How Come, You don’t want to hear what’s going On?’, as a general world address, in my mind, about the simple message of Desteni and the solution of Equality. So it seems I turned it back on myself with an answer.


There are some really great new books out at Eqafe.com, have a look.

Also World/Self/Solutions: desteni.org, and equalmoney.org


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In the supermarket.


I was walking around in a supermarket, I believed that if I looked through the selection of products I might find something which I wanted to eat.  In one of the aisles there was a little boy, must have been 2 or 3 years old. He was touching everything he could reach with his hands, trailing them along, feeling the surfaces of lids and packets on the bottom shelves while his mother advanced further and further ahead, pushing along her trolley. For him there was no time and money equation, no hurry in the world. His hands were checking everything they could, that is he was resting the palm of his hand on the plastic lids or wrappers, trailing his fingers as he drifted along, jumping them through space from one surface to the next. His progression along the aisle was like a dance of hands. Then he stopped walking and just stood there with both hands hanging loosely in the air, and then slowly slowly his right hand raised itself up and opened like a flower floating, just feeling the air.

Recognizing a picture of a raised hand as a symbol in my mind, this thought came up, that ‘he is waving to me’. I checked his eyes, but they were not focused on anything, he was not ‘waving’ to me, not seeing me, I was not in his picture. What had happed to me at this point was that I had gone into a sort of startle, selecting some construct of relationship in my mind. That if he was waving to me then there was something I should do, like go through a menu of appropriate reactions and select, walk down an aisle of symbolic products in my own supermarket of consciousness. In a moment I had gone from simply watching this being to acceptance and allowance of myself as a reaction of energy, as a factor in some algorithm, compiling myself back into the matrix of the system.



In either case, there is a point of sale, that point where the money is transferred, I am given a piece of paper with a record of the exact time and date of the transaction. Numbers have been crunched and ripples go out into digital displays across the world. Someone becomes richer someone becomes poorer, and someone starves because I have signed a decree that their food should be taken away, and somewhere in a township or a maggot farm a young child giggles and raises their fingers into the breeze.


Underneath the nightmare, there is another nightmare, only it’s the same one in close-up. Underneath the nightmare of capitalism and consumerism, there is the nightmare of this accepted consciousness in the mind which is the intricate mechanism of self-interest, fear and greed. Underneath the nightmare of the hell which we have created in other ‘countries,’ is the nightmare of other people accepting and allowing our abuse.


Introduced into the ecosystem of our organic being, this alien disc of gold that puts money into all the eyes of the world, that severs and then bridges a gap between the physical and the mind, so that every thought holds some reference to money, to survive.


Is there anything in this supermarket to eat that hasn’t come out of a secret hell in some far away ‘other’ ‘country’?


Take a look at the documentary ‘Darwin’s Nightmare’. Have a look at a close up study of just one of the sucking tentacles of millions that make up this monster which we participate in. See here how abuse slides into atrocity. Here is the hell we have created in Tanzania, the realities which we do not see when we buy into our pretty pictures in the supermarket. Artificially and deliberately created poverty disease and war are the processes that surround and spread out from the consumer system.

Have a look at the eyes that look up at to the sky and see the European jets bringing in their money making cargoes of death machines and taking away their food. Underneath the hell exposed by this documentary is another hell which isn’t even covered, in which human bodies float down the rivers into the lake, coming from another hell, Rwanda.

Following the strings which are attached to all our goods lead into places such as this. Places where deaths are not recorded, and people are not named.


This system is entirely a reflection of who we have accepted ourselves to be, which has accumulated into an insult to Life. We have to stop this. We can stop this. We can change ourselves. We can change this system of atrocity and abuse.


Investigate EqualMoney.org.

Investigate yourself with support from desteni.co.za.


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Progress. Looking at the dictionary definition: Moving forward or onward in space or time, that’s progress. Develop towards something better, that’s progress.


So in this world ‘progress’ has been re-styled as an ideal connected up with science and technology. As such it is a desirable, because ‘better’ technology means, what? More effective weapons? More effective control? More effective entertainment systems? Means that we are ‘winning’ more effectively in our economic competition between ‘countries’? Means that we can travel faster? Means that we can look forward to having new things turning up in our consumer outlets? Means that we can do away with our old systems so as to buy upgrades? Is this what technology is for, to enhance and refresh and protect our consumer experience?


The development of the consumer society rests on encouraging the self interested ego in beings, encouraging desires to win, to look better, to buy things to sate their appetites, to be entertained, to be constantly distracted. While scarcity of money means a constant fear of survival and a constant need to reward oneself for the toils of work. Fear of a broader kind is fostered through false and biassed information from the media which is used to create a false reality bubble within which this consumer desire can flourish. Meanwhile the powers that be can go about furthering their ends without dissent. This means mostly raping and swindling other countries for their resources. It would be a stable system if it wasn’t for the rampant nature of greed and the finite quantity of physical resources.


The rampant nature of Greed. Why is this? What is ‘Greed’? It is like an extreme form of desire which is coupled up with competition and jealousy and the need to win, hence the desire to have more than others, and the acceptance of others to have less. It is a characteristic of ego as Self imprisoned into a systematic trap of self-interest. Rampant  ego in self interest as a lie, trapped forever in being a lie, an absolute denial of Self as Life.


Living in a world of deception we have a system founded on and sustained by lies, which educates beings into becoming  possessed as egos of self interest, who are encouraged to give away their power and self responsibility, who vote according to the demands and reactions of their own systems of self abuse so as to feed their cravings for energy and their addictions, while those who have the power pander to and exploit the desires of their subjects for the sake of more and more power to somehow make heaven on earth for themselves within the unreality of their minds. Demonocracy.



So practically, what can be done for actual democracy to become possible? Everybody has to know about the universal tools of Self Forgiveness and Self Correction, everybody has to see that Self Change and Self Realisation is possible. I have to utilize this internet technology so that it supports Life, mass-communicate the message of equality, share the process of Self Forgiveness and Self correction, these methods and tools of Actual Self Change so that it will reach as many people as possible, so that we can reach out beyond the boundaries of this mind control, give back to ourselves our power, our self responsibility, give back to ourselves our Self as Life. This is the task which has been taken on by Destonians.


Come and join us! Let’s make realisation of Equality go Viral, so that together we can bring in an Equal Money System and put a start to actual progress of humanity in which all are walking in the same direction, in which a world democracy is a constant first vote by living beings for World Equality and what is Best for All.



more information: www.desteni.co.za







I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as a being that fosters and exploits the reactions of others as systems so as to get money, so as to win, so as to feel better about myself and for not realising how within this I am accepting and allowing myself to be totally possessed and exploited by my own system.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as a being obsessed with winning and for not allowing myself to see that in doing this I am creating the circumstances in which I can win, such as competition, conflict and war.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe in ‘technological progress’ as a thing in itself and for not allowing myself to realise that the only technological progress possible is how effectively it can support Life.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge the system in which I live as demonic, and for not allowing myself to realise that the system which I describe is a direct reflection of the system of myself and how I am in my own consciousness.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself as demonic and for being unwilling to face that the only demon is the energy of my mind attempting to simulate life while I am absent from who I am in abdication of my responsibility.

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Continuing to dismantle this ME-ality, this Mind Energetic Reality, which I have accepted and allowed as Here, Breath by Breath.

Waking up, opening up my eyes to face self has been for me a fearful process, a process in which I did not allow myself to see that this connection with fear was showing me a version of self which I had created within and as my mind.

What else has there ever been but this facing of self and avoidance of facing of self. And what of this creation of fear which I have accepted and allowed and then separated from as if it was the single enduring proof in my life that what I am here is this mind which exists separate to and less than this feature of my experience which I have called fear?

Writing this I remember how as a child I had repeated dreams in which I had ‘been chased’ into the dead end represented by the top of a building which had no rails around the edge so that it seemed and then was inevitable that I was drawn to and over the edge. Looking at this now it seems as if my dream reality was like a course in which I was practicing the reaction of fear, running away from something or falling off something. What I was establishing my faith in was running away from fear, or falling into fear, justifying these activities with pictures and stories. While in my body I was connecting over and over fear with this unpleasant sensation of a charge in my solar plexus. In the dream I seem to have been compiling the programme of fear of being unable to escape from fear, as fear of fear; and fear of having no control over fear, as fear of fear, or fear of being enslaved to fear as fear of fear.

Coming back to avoidance of facing self, in which statement fear is explicitly entwined with self, I am accepting and allowing fear of self. Opening up my eyes when I wake up in the morning I am facing self, if I do this as self in fear, then I am waking up not in the real world but in a mind projected reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe in fear and for allowing myself to connect fear to fear so that I exist trapped within and as my beliefs as fear of fear.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try and escape from fear and for not allowing myself to realize that in doing this I am sabotaging myself within by accepting escape as real, then fear as real also.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear having no control over fear and for not allowing myself to realize that in seeking to control fear I am acting in fear of fear and continuing to live in the world of the mind in which I have accepted fear as real.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being enslaved by fear and for not allowing myself to realize that in fearing being enslaved by fear I am acting in fear of fear and thus creating the enslavement which I fear.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect this unpleasant sensation in my solar plexus to fear and for not allowing myself to realize that in fearing this sensation in my body I am acting in fear of fear.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define reality according to my beliefs in the thoughts in my mind, and for not allowing myself to realize that if I am living in a reality defined by the thoughts in my mind then the reality in which I live is no different to a dream world.

Nightmares, myself as a series of the same nightmare. Myself as fear of fear.

Having a special word for these dreams seemed to confirm that they had some form of reality, that they existed having being given a special word. The special word was ‘nightmare’, a horse of the night. Accepting and allowing fear of and as myself I had no wish to enquire any further what and why it should be named as such. Better to leave that knowledge ‘unopened’ I must have thought, in fear, so as not to possibly re-experience the fear which was for me the inner essence of the word.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that a ‘nightmare’ could exist as separate from me because it had a special word for what it was.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word ‘nightmare’ to fear and thus in fear of nightmares accepting and allowing myself as fear of fear.

I remember how I would ‘come’ to a ‘place’ in my sleep or in my transition out of ‘waking’ (lol) consciousness when I would recognize the signs of a ‘nightmare’ being about to ‘arrive’, and then it was ‘too late’. It would be as if I was strapped on to a conveyer belt so that it was inevitable that I would go into this experience which I had defined as a nightmare.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that ‘there is nothing I can do’, and that ‘I cannot move myself’.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as the victim of my own experience in which I had abandoned and suppressed my own responsibility as myself within the experience of my mind.

I forgive myself for not allowing myself to realize that the ‘inevitability’ of the coming nightmare was me experiencing myself as my mind as fear of fear. Because the dreams which I remember were all ‘repeater’, ‘re-occurring’ dreams, ‘nightmares’, they were actually re-occurring memories of dreams.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as less than my memories in which I had accepted and allowed myself to be a victim to these memories, in which I accepted and allowed these memories as real instead of realizing and understanding that these were pictures, thoughts within my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to programme myself within reacting over and over again to a memory, a story which I am telling myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe in a story which I am telling myself in which I define myself as fear of fear.

For more information about this process go to: www.desteni.co.za

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In terms of walking the tools of Self Honesty, Self Forgiveness and Self Correction, I as a Destonian, can call myself a ‘walker’.

Seeing realizing and understanding how I am walking my Self through and as the mind, through this Self as Ego, through this total mind experience which I have existed in and which I have accepted and allowed as a reality, I find this reality itself to be nothing more than my belief, a consensual consequence of the projection of the mind of Self as humanity as a whole. Yes physical consequence, but not as I have seen it with my eyes, any more than I have seen the mind through which I am projecting the separation which I have accepted and allowed as myself.

Realisation of my responsibility as the source of this is not constant. I walk along breath by breath, sometimes falling into participation with experience, reaction. Sharing and expressing what this is that I am walking seems at once the most important thing and the most difficult thing. Every word seems preloaded and sabotaged by this medium of Ego. Like for example the word Equality. Absorbed and then re-marketed, it becomes an energetic entity, a political preference, a slogan, a kind of relationship, a comparison of separated quantities, in this process the actual significance of Equality as a key to Self as Life has then been successfully avoided. That real sharing and real communication is impossible without Equality is a fact that could potentially destroy the ego.

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I Am Here. Some things do not require an ‘explanation’. Where could an explanation of ‘I Am Here’ possibly lead to, except Away from the point? It’s the same with the Equality Message which follows directly out of our shared I-am-here-ness; does this really need to be explained?

Looking at this I realize how much my need to understand is like a controlling mechanism, I am trying to encompass it with and as my mind, and as a reflection of this I am offering such an approach to an other by means of an explanation through which an understanding of the mind might possibly result. In this process real communication is abandoned for the sake of validation of my ego.

Since our equality as substantial beings is beyond debate, the questioning of the validity of a system based on equality can only be a projection of fear, an attempt to somehow justify a denial of what is real. And yet somehow I miss this point over and over allowing this self seduction into and as a chain of lifeless words.

How to stay with my breath in these moments of meeting, how to stay with the reality of I am Here as Life, present. These are the issues which I lay aside. By laying my reality aside I have turned it into an ‘issue’. That means I have re-integrated as an outpost of mind-control. The realization of this being what I am doing is part of this exasperation which I feel, remembering the starting point of “hey here we are in Life!” but somehow I have allowed Life to fall down empty.

That must be the greatest insult in the universe.

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The Self that I can remember as me Here was born into this physical world half-way through last century. This worldwide culture that I was born into has no specific name, though it’s chief characteristics are Acceptance and Allowance. The particular design of this acceptance and allowance which I was born into was according to the state/location of England, to English parents, accepting and allowing myself to be defined as ‘English’, to wear the mantle of ‘English’ history, and to subscribe to ‘English’ attitudes and opinions while all the people around me did likewise. Soon we were all busy handing out this stuff to each other, having accepted and allowed the specific inputs of our media/education and positioning ourselves within the accepted parameters of the culture.

If I had been born elsewhere I would have applied the culture of acceptance and allowance according to that state/place. The cardinal principle of this world wide culture is to hand over our power of self responsibility so that we can then be defined and limited by those around us and ourselves which is as a mind experience of consciousness. No matter where we have happened to be born on this Earth we grow up in and as this acceptance and belief of Self being an individual separated entity, isolated in the mystery of an energetic triangle of thought, feeling and emotion.

The systems that we have devised to back up our surrender of responsibility as Life is a construct of thought, which is religion. With this we recount various old and ancient codes and scripts which tell us that there is in fact an invisible superpower which has all responsibility, which is in absolute control of human destiny. How mad is that?

The facts of physical reality of how we have messed up so extensively with each other and this world in the application of this culture of acceptance and allowance only add to our fear of the suggestion that we might possibly be responsible for what has happened, leading us to hope even more fervently for the reality of this invisible superpower, and for us to glorify this activity of belief and faith as if it is a superior ability of ourselves as humans.

It is hard for us to see that what we have bought into with our belief in God and all the splendours of an after-life is a system of slavery on Earth, because when we have a look, no responsibility does not equal freedom, no responsibility equals slavery.

The ultimate achievement of brainwashing would be the achievement of an unquestionable reality. Is this what we’ve got? Is this culture of acceptance and allowance so oppressive that we dare not look beyond? That we cannot look at our ‘religion’ and ask ourselves, so, what is the source of our fear of responsibility, and is it real?

There IS a solution.

We can wake each other and ourselves up. We can dare to look into the bigger ‘picture’ of Self Here. Together we can change this world. We can make it into a world that’s Best for All.

One plus One we can make a difference. Come and join us.


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